7.04.2013

Neo-Prodigy Takes on the Abagond Challenge

As a social justice activist and a queer person of color, I've come to learn that there are two rules one should never break less they face the wrath of unholy hell by legions upon legions of white fauxminists:

Rule #1) Never call out their heterosexism and their homophobia in denigrating and oppressing queer men, specifically in their shitty m/m romance slashfics.

Rule #2) Never and I do mean EVER uplift or praise or promote women of color in any shape or fashion, ESPECIALLY BLACK WOMEN. To do so will at minimum will get you branded a misogynist, or at worst will have white women trying to pull a Rosewood or stalking you or sending you death threats.

I've never been one to play by the rules.

I love my women of color. Black women have a very special place in my heart. Maybe that's why I feature them in most of my stories. Perhaps it's because I've been blessed to have so many extraordinary black women in my life. Be they family members, friends, bosses, teachers, professors, colleagues and other loved ones.

As a kid, I saw the struggles they endured but even as a kid I didn't grasp all of the hardships they faced. Even today as an adult, I still don't.

As a child, I grew up with the notion that beauty comes in a myriad of forms. While I knew of racism, I still thought America had evolved enough to appreciate people as people. I was 7, sue me. I knew Grace Jones was beautiful in a certain way that was different from say Brooke Shields who was beautiful in a way that was different Madonna who was beautiful in a certain way that was different from Paula Abdul who was beautiful in a certain way that was different from my first girlfriend Janet, Ms. Jackson If You're Nasty.

I thought most people had this view but sadly I got a sobering lesson years later while watching an episode of Saved by the Bell.

Kelly, Jessie, and Lisa were doing a photoshoot where each of them came out in some hot styles. When Kelly appeared, the studio audience cheered. When Jessie came out, the audience cheered. Each time Lisa came out, dead silence. Maybe one or two claps at best. It didn't take a rocket scientist to figure out what was going on. Three beautiful women on a hit show and the only one who gets no love is the black girl. It was really easy to see what the score was there.

As years passed, I would continue to see endless examples of this. I would watch Don Imus call a team of beautiful collegiate athletes “nappy headed hoes” and still have a career.

John Mayer would outright insult black women and most mainstream media would shrug their shoulders.

Quacks for scientists would write bogus studies about how unattractive black women are, expecting people to be convinced.

Movies, television and other forms of media would continue their endless assault on black women: my sisters, my mothers, my friends, my loved ones, my First Lady, Michelle Obama.

These attacks were unrelenting and conveniently white feminists did nothing. Their silence spoke volumes.

But said fauxminists came out of the woodwork when myself and others stood in support of black women. I was accused of being a misogynist, mansplaining, and being a racist for calling white women out on their racism. I’m not going to even touch on the rampant heterosexism and homophobia that queer males have to endure at the hands of bigoted white fauminists. Let’s just say the harassing emails and death threats from those savage mongrels was always fun.

But no matter what, sisters persevere and still they rise. No matter how much shade she receives, the First Lady continues to be flawless. No matter how many times they’re denigrated the Williams sisters silence their critics by winning another championship. Janelle Monae continues to make me get up and dance and celebrate her and every other queen.

For me, I continue to celebrate my Nubian Queens because I know what’s at stake.

Whether it’s a post like this:

http://dennisupkins.com/2013/03/08/nubian-heroines-a-tribute/

Or even in my stories. My upcoming novel, West of Sunset, features two extraordinary sisters that I can’t wait for the world to meet and fall in love with.

It may not be much but I believe every bit helps. Even if it means going against the rules.

But I was never one to play by the rules.

6 comments:

  1. Playing by the rules doesn't work when the game is rigged. I stand with you, dear brotha from anotha motha. Boss-ome post!!

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  2. When I was younger, you couldn't tell me anybody looked better than Grace Jones. I was never big on idols, but she was real close.

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  3. You bring up some great points about the White women you described in your post. I just love it when you call them out on their game.

    Though I have listed a lot of reasons that I love being a Black woman there is one reasons that I love who Iam'there is another great reason that I love being it: being instinctive. I remembered looking at TV and there as a Black psychologist on a panel talking about the subject on race. One of the things that she said was that we know White folks better than they know themselves and its the absolute truth."A hit dog will holler" my mom would say when somebody get caught on a lie and this ring true about the women you discuss on here. Every time they get caught in a lie the same song is sung..the same descriptive words sort of like knowing cheaters. They have patterns that don't change. This how these women are.

    You don't have to be called the N words to be called such. The things you call them out on say it all.I especially laugh at how some racist will accuse you of being a racist but their meaning of how they describe you never makes sense.Eventually, their true nature will come out if you get next to them . I was thinking about the part that you discussed about Saved by they Bell. You are so right. I would watch that show and watched Degrassi(it was called Jr high during my day) .Now I sometimes watch it with my teenaged nephews.

    One of the things I noticed about Degrassis Black characters is how they are never predominate characters in the show. Like in their love lives,non of the Black characters..hot or not... are never thought of as being darlings of he show.Now mind you Aubrey Graham (Drake) and another guy who plays Mike Dallas are comes/came close to being players in the series but something has to go wrong (I was really surprised that Drake had a girlfriend. ). Even with the prettiest Black girls on that show, its a little worse. They can be involved with the most popular and/or hottest guys non Black guys on that show. They will either be nerds (nothing wrong with being that but high school culture thinks otherwise )or will set them up with the least popular guy on there. Though the Black male/biracial characters fair better, overall they were never in a romantic relationship with the shows most popular characters and of course not too many of their fans asked about them. Gosh! They are sooooo obvious with their message. When will these women own up to the truth? Oops..why am I asking that dumb question?

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  4. Maybe I am being naive but how does your uplifting and extolling of black women lead to others calling you a misogynist?

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    Replies
    1. The same way calling out racism leads others to call you a racist.

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    2. Have you MET any white women? OMG, say anything that points out their racism an privilege in relations to black women and they will call totally pull the misogyny and reverse racism card (they'll do this to WOC too)...

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