Contemplating "Black, Loud, and Ghetto"

We've all been seeing a steady increase in people constantly linking black women with the terms "loud" and "ghetto" (and often "fat" as well).  It's no surprise that this is happening now, with BW/WM and AM/BW relationships on the steady rise (whether people like it or not).

Here's why I don't burst a blood vessel whenever I read this.  I've noticed that many non-black men try to get an ego boost by talking about how they reject all the "loud, ghetto" black women who (I seriously doubt) are supposedly constantly hitting on them.  I've noticed they say this sort of thing both in person and online, which I'm pretty sure most of you do too.

Since such women are actually the minority, not majority of black women, I've decided to remain amused.  I will be the first to admit that black women are not a "perfect" group.  We've got some bad apples in our barrel.  But that's just it.  If* only the bad apples are hitting on you, then there's something about you which attracts that type of woman.

But pygmy forbid people pause to even consider that.

I've noticed that some of the men who talk like this to my face are men whom I myself have rejected, sometimes repeatedly.  I don't know if these statements are coming from sour grapes, or if they're a lame attempt to put me in my place, but I've suddenly noticed how they don't bother me anymore.  I find myself looking upon the speaker almost with pity, like, "You want a beautiful black woman, but you can't get one.  The good ones probably don't even acknowledge that you exist.

"Hearing 'no' all the time must really fuck you up after a while."

See Also

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*And that's a BIG if, 'cause I'm not buying this army of fat, loud, ghetto black women who throw themselves at non-black men.

Comments

  1. ""Hearing 'no' all the time must really fuck you up after a while." "

    More than that, hearing no from someone they consider 3/5 subhumans must REALLY skullfuck them.

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  2. I have to give you poetry snaps for this one. I think it is an attempt to put one in their so called place.

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  3. Two things:

    1. I wonder why "being loud" is such a bad thing, who determines "loudness" and why does it only apply to black women? Has it occured that certain people can project better than others? Would they rather talk to someone who can barely speak above a whisper? I mean, what da hell?

    2. "Being loud", and I use those words loosely, doesn't equal being "ghetto" another word I use loosely. A ghetto is a place, not an adjective. So, they need to kill that noise. Plus, using it as such a term is nothing short of racist dialogue no matter how it's used. For example, "That girl has a big, ghetto booty" which means "That female has an enourmous gluteus maximus like a woman of African descent living in an economically impoverished neighborhood in America."

    Excellent post, Ankhesen.

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  4. Boss piece of art. M. Gibson is the shiznit. I need to have him do one of my gorgeous self.

    I've noticed that some of the men who talk like this to my face are men whom I myself have rejected, sometimes repeatedly. I don't know if these statements are coming from sour grapes...

    Yeah.

    ...or if they're a lame attempt to put me in my place...

    Yeah. Without a clue as to what said place is. It's above them and above all that bullshit. If this makes me sound like a sididdy bitch, then so be it. I own my sididdiness top to bottom and I will not waste my time with an unworthy man.

    ...but I've suddenly noticed how they don't bother me anymore. I find myself looking upon the speaker almost with pity, like, "You want a beautiful black woman, but you can't get one. The good ones probably don't even acknowledge that you exist.

    No. We don't. These types of men aren't even a smashed gnat on the windshield of our lives. You know I've covered that topic repeatedly in my blog.

    "Hearing 'no' all the time must really fuck you up after a while."

    Self-esteem be shit after repeated rejections from the women you really want.

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  5. I can't stand the "loud, ghetto..and sometimes fat stereotype" first, do you know how many women I know who are white that are louder and more obnoxious than any of the black folks I've been around. Lots. I have one friend, who I swear if she was black she would be that stereotype, but she's white so she gets a free pass. Go to any sorority and you find loud and" ghetto" behavior running rampant and lots of those women aren't black. It really frustrates me that obnoxious and out of line at times behaviour by whites gets chalked up to sayings like" boys will be boys, or they were just young and stupid". But when it comes to minorities we are being ghetto.as I get older I've come to realize that the main problem is that poc (blacks in particular ) are seen as monolithic groups. What one does falls on us all, we are all representing eachother in the eyes of many whites. Whites however get to be individuals and speak for themsleves when the mess up, but when they do something excellent suddenly that speaks for them all. But what's worse is now I find that when minorities do amazing things the media doesn't thrust that positive light on minorty groups as a whole, but instead down play it or worse, try to find some white ancestry to explain how said person of color could accomplish great things. I also feel like with individuals in the media like michelle obama, the more postive black women we see, the more success black women have, the greater backlash we will see, and these" ghetto" stereotypes will be pushed more and more.

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  6. @ Amaya

    Boss piece of art. M. Gibson is the shiznit.

    Boo-boo, I did this.

    @ BrothaWolf & idiclove

    I also feel like with individuals in the media like michelle obama, the more postive black women we see, the more success black women have, the greater backlash we will see, and these" ghetto" stereotypes will be pushed more and more.

    "Loud, fat, and ghetto" are basically up and coming drone-speak. One drone sees another use these words with black women, they copy, paste, submit, and another lemming comes along and does the same.

    And it's not just white folks; it's some black men and non-black POC as well, esp. since we see positive images of black women in non-white, non-black fandoms. And ALL of it is a reaction to seeing beautiful, classy black women.

    Focusing on the fat issue, I've noticed an increase in seeing slender (or at least physically fit) black women in media. But despite their obvious health and/or smaller size, I'm hearing more and more about these epic hordes of morbidly obese black women who are damn near sexually assaulting every man in sight.

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  7. @ Neo-Prodigy

    More than that, hearing no from someone they consider 3/5 subhumans must REALLY skullfuck them.

    But they swear up and down they don't see you that way.

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  8. But despite their obvious health and/or smaller size, I'm hearing more and more about these epic hordes of morbidly obese black women who are damn near sexually assaulting every man in sight.
    -------------------
    someone must have been watching Norbit thinking of that Rasputia. Bitch if I hardly see a Rasputia where the mario kart are you seeing them everywhere and tell me why are they checking for you?

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  9. I am a loud black woman. Not because I scream but I have an easier time projecting my voice. If I get excited in a discussion I project. Can't help it. If people insist on judging me because I'm not soft spoken so be it. Me and my booming voice command attention if people are intimidated thats a personal problem.

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  10. It's sour grapes, man. Sour grapes.

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  11. Pretty much with Brotha Wolf and Pepp on this issue.

    They use these adjectives pejoratively so that people will rush to throw others under the bus. I don't make a point of saying I'm not "ghetto," (meaning black) "loud," (meaning unapologetically black) and well black. I'd rather define myself by what I am and not feel ashamed by how others do themselves. There's myriad thought regarding what black people are, and what I hope we can be is a people who allows ourselves to be what we are "freely," even if we are wrong or contrary to what society would like us to be.

    These people are really funny. They're grasping for crumbs so they don't feel as worthless as us "others" ought to feel.

    Personally I think loudness is a good thing. If I were louder people would have a better time hearing me and I wouldn't be talked over as easily. And having a loud presence can certainly offer me some defense in certain situations.

    And I really don't want to address the word ghetto. It's a place that has been systematically created to keep the "undesirables" as far from white "civilized" society as possible. It's one of the quickest routes to disenfranchisement. It's become jumbled issue of class and race, as you'll know that some black people of middle and upper class sometimes pit themselves against blacks who are poor and working class. This has been going on for a while actually. There's documentation of black northerners in the early 1900s shunning the concept of the "old negro" which was a southerner, among other things. And the idea of a respectable black image which has dirtied even our civil rights history. I mean, how many know of the woman who came before Rosa Parks?

    But back on topic, these men could hardly garner any woman's attention, so of course they look to boost their egos by saying at the very least the "undesirables" can't stop trying to fuck them.

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  12. But back on topic, these men could hardly garner any woman's attention, so of course they look to boost their egos by saying at the very least the "undesirables" can't stop trying to fuck them.

    Pretty much. I guess what I'm trying to say here is that the words themselves are meaningless. No "fat, loud, ghetto" black women are talking to these men. Or maybe ONE did and they are just clinging to that singular experience the same way they do their black friends.

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  13. These days, people just spew out the word "ghetto" like it's nothing.If some of those jilted guys knew where ghettos really originated from ,they would probably shut their traps up.

    I've also learned that society's idea of being "loud" isn't so much of turning up the volume in your voice,but being your own person.Some guys, like the losers mentioned on his blog cannot accept that.As mentioned on here, they had expectations of them being readily accepted.After all, all Black women are so crying so desperately for a man that we'll jump at the first man that walks,right?

    I agree with Marona,why should we feel ashamed to be who we are? I'm proud being "loud". I like the idea of speaking out the problems that afflict me. If being such means not holding in problems that will cause you your mental and physical health and speaking out against the injustices of this world, I'm so glad to be that woman

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  14. "Loud, fat, and ghetto" are basically up and coming drone-speak. One drone sees another use these words with black women, they copy, paste, submit, and another lemming comes along and does the same

    But show white people doing the same darned thing and you either have patriotic citizens standing up for their rights; or a bunch of young people letting off steam. “I mean you can’t judge an entire race of people based upon the actions of a few,” Whites say. We should be judged as individuals they’ll say.

    Sadly in these situations ‘Children’ whip out cell phones an upload our dysfunction for all the world to see. Bigotry does the rest. White males figure if black men hate black women, (it’s implied, a white man will say) then its certainly ok for them to jump on the bandwagon. Our digital landscape has fed erroneous perceptions that black women are loud and aggressive. A slant stoked in-part by young black men with mommy/daddy issues, still tied to their mother’s Tit in some cases. So when a white man is rejected by a black woman (who should be happy to be with a guy like him) he falls back on the thing he knows best to lessen the sting of his own rejection.

    Just had a white family move from next door and they put the black female stereotype to shame. Both parents screamed and yelled. Moreover, all nine of their children screamed and yelled at each other; including the parents. Originally they were from Beaver Township, PA., (the country) but were forced to move because of high rent. Many times the mother voiced her concerns (there were too many blacks in the neighborhood). I picked this tidbit up one quiet evening as she and her husband were going at it. “But you got black people everywhere!!!” was her husband’s response.

    Yelling had become the primary form of communication between members of this family; with everyone conditioned to respond to the other in kind. The children were particularly loud. I’m not talking noisy during the course of child’s play. I’m talking ear-splitting levels all day long. The six year old child (twelve if he was a day) screamed constantly. He screamed when he was frustrated. He screamed when he was excited- happy- pissed off; in melancholy, or bored. I thought they’d never move out.

    Why do blacks think most white men are child molesters and serial killers? Because of the frequency in which we see such reports in the media. The wave of white female teachers getting caught with kids would lead one to believe that all white women crave young flesh. The same goes for the rash of bestiality reports amongst white men/women. These videos go viral and white men (who already have a low opinion of us) use this material as a way to cement their racist beliefs. Stories like these are aired so frequently the media becomes the message. Seems to me black women (loud or otherwise) should be the least of the white man’s concern.

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  15. Yes we've all seen the obese,loud,white person I've seen more whites being loud than any race. But the thing is whites are seen as individuals. Part of the White Privilege in my opinion, they deny most of the time but some do admit though.
    Anyway K, great post.

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  16. Oh and I know this is offtopic but people should check out this white privilege post by this white woman.

    Some of the things she says that stuck out to me though everything did.

    Her post, http://www.rootswomen.com/articles/whitebenefits.html

    16. I can dress poorly, look like hell and not have to worry that I'll be mistaken for a derelict or a criminal.


    20.As a white woman, I can exhibit some of the characteristics that have been made into stereotypes about persons of color and no one thinks anything in particular of it, good or bad! For example, in a restaurant/bar full of white people I can laugh and carry on in a fairly rowdy manner with other whites without customers at other tables getting offended and thinking we're loud and uncouth because of our race.

    24 E I can walk up to persons on the street and ask for directions without their feeling suspicious that maybe I have an ulterior motive.

    You guys definitely check it out.

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  17. I'm with Pepp and M. Proud to be loud.

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  18. It is just another way of painting us as irrational illogical animals. I'm naturally quiet so my loudness has a purpose and all of my anger is righteous. If I yell it is because I'm in danger or someone else is doing something dangerous/stupid. Yet white people will cringe and look terrified like I pulled a gun on them. As far as all black women are fat goes, I'm sick of white media portraying normal healthy size black women like Mrs. Obama or Beyonce as fat. Yes some black women are plus size but they have just as much rights and personal agency as anyone else. People seem to expect big women to hide and be ashamed.

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  19. Lol....There is a long history of the whites using the "ghetto" against POC. First we have to define what a ghetto is, usually a poor section of a city inhabited primarily by people of the same race, religion, or social background, often because of discrimination (answers.com, 2011). We see this tactic used against Native peoples (they called them reservations), against Jews, against Japanese-Americans (they called them internment camps), and finally African-Americans ( it seems to have started as a project or the projects). None of the other groups, as hurt by the experience of being ghettoized (my word…lol) as they were, have been followed so closely by the term. No other group has been defined as a group by it. If anything they are lauded for overcoming it, living through it. I am not too deep into the Native culture but I have yet to hear a term that refers to a set type of stereotypical Native American behaviors using the reservation. I have not heard people say, “she is so reservation with her lack of education and drinking”. This is just not said.
    I use to think this term was applied to us because we are still sectioned off in these ghettos but many Natives still live on reservations. Then I thought maybe it is because we are vocal about the discrimination and won’t allow whites to forget the unfair treatment done to us….but then I look at the Jewish who very much have never shied away from telling the world what was done to them at the hands of whites (Nazis’)….So I am left to wonder why we are followed by that term and the only reason I can come up with is it is part of the arsenal of weak retorts whites have in order to try to stifle any debates and talk of racism and even more importantly white privilege. ‘You are so loud, you so ghetto, you’re playing the race card’….these are equivalent to a STFU from whites who are not capable of admitting their part in the unfairness of white privilege and race inequality in the world. So like a child bested they resort to name calling and disses in hopes of making us cry. So they crafted these quips to throw out to silence the discussion. We are to be so horrified that they think we are ghetto or we are hiding behind race that we will drop the discussion, argument, case and not hold their feet to the fire……
    Read more: http://www.answers.com/topic/ghetto#ixzz1SqhAws5C

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  20. None of the other groups, as hurt by the experience of being ghettoized (my word…lol) as they were, have been followed so closely by the term. No other group has been defined as a group by it. If anything they are lauded for overcoming it, living through it. I am not too deep into the Native culture but I have yet to hear a term that refers to a set type of stereotypical Native American behaviors using the reservation. I have not heard people say, “she is so reservation with her lack of education and drinking”. This is just not said.

    OMG - good point!!!

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  21. Long time reader, first time commenter. I love that you wrote about this topic because it's something I've often reflected about as a black woman. I'm typically reserved and I'm petite, and I recently had a class with a black woman who was loud and fat. I wouldn't call her "ghetto" based on the typical common definition in our current vernacular but I know most people would probably use the trifecta simply because she was loud, overweight, and dark-skinned (I note this because I really don't see a lot of lighter-skinned women deemed ghetto, regardless of personality or size). My initial reaction to her loud comments was one of extreme embarrassment and an urge to make sure that I came off as the exact opposite... which, of course, is bullshit for a number of reasons. One of the things I reflected on was the point that SO WHAT if she was loud and fat? Why should the onus be on her to change her personality because of negative associations with it that she didn't create and not on the people who would stereotype and disrespect her because she was loud and fat or use her as evidence via confirmation bias that we're "all" like that, as opposed to her simply being loud because... that's just HER personality as a human being, not as a black woman?

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  22. ***comment moderation

    @ "Rickyzooter"

    Yeah...you're sooooo happy that you had to come all the way over here and tell a bunch of people who couldn't care less. *eye roll* Whatever.

    Dream on about the whole "permanence" thing. You're becoming extinct and no one's going to miss the likes of you when you're gone.

    Don't forget to let the door hit you really hard on your flat ass on your way out of my bar.

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