They Don't Care" and as expected, it gathered several comments almost instantly. The following is taken from an email conversation, and is reprinted with her permission.
Myth and Realities of American Sex: What Women Must Contend With
I'm with RVCBard on the porn-fed imagination of the American male.
What does the average American male learn about women and sex from porn?
That women are always ready for sex. If we're not already horny, we can become aroused quite easily no matter WHAT the circumstances are. And all it takes is for the man to indicate he wants sex. Since women merely exist to service men sexually, she'd better comply anytime he wants.
That women are easily orgasmic. As I said before, not so much. For most women, it takes WORK for her to achieve that O and certain conditions have to already be in place before a woman can even become at ease enough to engage in sex. If she feels unattractive, especially if she believes her partner finds her unattractive in some way, she may not feel like having sex. If she doesn't feel safe (and I mean emotionally and mentally as well as physically) sex will be problematic. If she doesn't feel secure or that her needs will be met yet again, sex could be problematic. That doesn't mean she won't go through with it, but it won't be a fantastic experience for her. And I'm also not saying that the only way she can feel at ease is in a committed relationship.
From the first two porn-fed assumptions the comes the third, that woman therefore don't need much stimulation to get in "the mood." Meaning? That you don't really have to worry about doing anything for her. That's why the cunnilingus episodes in porn last like five licks. Sorry, but unless ol' girl is really revved up to the point she was about to pop anyway (which means her partner put in a LOT of prep work already), dude is gonna have to put in some WORK!
Which leads us to the idea that women all get off doing whatever it is their male partner wants them to do. Porn is made for men. Which is why most pornos are going to show hours and hours of blowjobs. Men love blowjobs. I'm not saying women don't like giving men blowjobs. There are plenty of women out there who get plenty turned on giving their man a bj and who love to do it. And then there's the minority that just ain't gonna do it. Don't like it. Don't see why they should be bothered.
But there are women who give their man a bj because they love that man and like to give him pleasure. It's not that they hate the act or think it "dirty" somehow. It just doesn't do that much for them. But they do it out of caring. I think that is most of the women out there. They'll do it but not for hours and hours as they show on porn videos (okay, it's not for hours but the ratio of minutes of licking the kitty vs. slobbin' the knob are disproportionally in favor of said knob).
Said women are also fine with doing whatever the man wants to do, no need for asking, consulting her or seeing if it's okay for her. Again, no need to ask her if there's anything SHE wants to do because...
Sex is only for men and therefore only for men to enjoy. Even a woman's enjoyment is simply a gauge to how potent a lover the guy is. Many women have had men get angry and pissy at them for not enjoying the sex they're having. Now wouldn't the better response be to stop and see WHAT SHE WANTS? Not if you merely see women as things to wipe your dick on or as servicers and entertainers of said dick. That woman not into the sex she's having with you is making YOU feel bad. And you're not fucking her to feel bad, dammit!
All sexual compatibility is instantaneous. There is no need to communicate a damn thing. Y'all just get in there and SMASH. This is analogous to what's fed women about love. If you HAVE to tell him/her or have them tell YOU what they want then it's not real.
And women all want the same thing. Most regular, non-fetish/specialty porn, shows the same acts and positions. It's the reason why so many women find porn to be so boring. Once you've gotten over the frisson of actually seeing two people doing it, you realize how utterly repetitive and unimaginative it is.
Which leads to the idea of never needing to change your sexual routine ever. As the quoted poster stated, as much as American men claim to be such freaks and down for whatever, dare to ask them to engage in a fantasy of yours however vanilla or to try a new technique or to touch you in a different way. And then wait for the pouting, frowning and general behavior of an eight year old made to eat all of his brussel sprouts. "Well, my other girlfriend(s) liked this!" "I've had no complaints so far!" (even though you may not even be complaining, just suggesting something different) they'll state filled with indignation. Or they may resort to slut-shaming, "You must be some sort of FREAK to want that!" "That's nasty!" "You must have been molested or something because that's only sometime an abuse victim would want." Nope, they want the stroke they finally mastered at 20 to be the only one they use for the rest of their sexual lives AND have each and every woman be perfectly satisfied with that.
It's like being served the same meal the same way everyday and then the chef getting pissy when you suggest a change in the menu and then even moreso when you indicate you no longer want to eat in his restaurant.
Oh, and the last lesson learned from American porn, if your woman doesn't follow all of the above rules, then she's a frigid, cockteasing, cold-hearted and twatted bitch that wants to keep your dick and balls in a mason jar under the sink, especially if she commits the crime of not being in the mood or *gasp* outright denying you sex at the moment you want it. If she requires you to take into account HER sexual needs at all, she's an overbearing, control-freak cunt or she's a damaged, abnormal slut because your dick alone should be good enough for her. If she DOES follow the lessons of porn then she's a degraded whore whom you can treat like a sexual toilet.
Gee, I wonder why so many American women have problems with the "free-wheeling sex" deal?
I bet all those Americans going to Brazil for ass are bringing the same whack ass sex game they used in America. They think they're doing something because those Brazilian chicas are telling them they're the shit because they're trying to empty dudes' wallets. And the gringos are thinking that the Brazilian women's "responsiveness" is proof that THEY are not the problem, but evil, designing, American bitches are.