VH1 Needs to Stop Making "Lists"

White privilege...absolutely nothing it can't ruin.  VH1 revealed its "100 Greatest Artists of All Time" and...just peep this bullshit right here, y'all:

100 Alicia Keys
99 Hall & Oates
98 Depeche Mode
97 Pretenders
96 Journey
95 OutKast
94 Mariah Carey
93 Pearl Jam
92 LL Cool J
91 Green Day
90 Elvis Costello
89 Beastie Boys
88 Bee Gees
87 George Michael
86 N.W.A.
85 The Band
84 Curtis Mayfield
83 Earth, Wind and Fire
82 Steely Dan
81 ABBA
80 Mary J. Blige
79 Eminem
78 Judas Priest
77 Lynyrd Skynyrd
76 Run-D.M.C.
75 Rush
74 The Cure
73 Van Morrison
72 Janis Joplin
71 R.E.M.
70 Def Leppard
69 Tupac Shakur
68 Otis Redding
67 Coldplay
66 Justin Timberlake
65 The Doors
64 Talking Heads
63 Notorious B.I.G.
62 Genesis
61 Cream
60 Whitney Houston
59 Tom Petty & The Heartbreakers
58 Cheap Trick
57 Iggy & The Stooges
56 KISS
55 Peter Gabriel
54 Public Enemy
53 Little Richard
52 Beyoncé
51 Billy Joel
50 Sade
49 Parliament-Funkadelic
48 Rage Against The Machine
47 Jay-Z
46 Ramones
45 Al Green
44 Joni Mitchell
43 Ray Charles
42 Metallica
41 Van Halen
40 The Police
39 The Kinks
38 Sly & The Family Stone
37 Fleetwood Mac
36 Paul McCartney
35 Johnny Cash
34 Tina Turner
33 Guns N’ Roses
32 Black Sabbath
31 John Lennon
30 Aerosmith
29 Radiohead
28 Elton John
27 Aretha Franklin
26 Neil Young
25 Chuck Berry
24 The Velvet Underground
23 AC/DC
22 The Clash
21 Bruce Springsteen
20 Marvin Gaye
19 U2
18 Pink Floyd
17 Queen
16 Madonna
15 The Beach Boys
14 Nirvana
13 The Who
12 David Bowie
11 Bob Marley
10 Stevie Wonder
09 James Brown
08 Elvis Presley
07 Prince
06 Jimi Hendrix
05 Rolling Stones
04 Led Zeppelin
03 Bob Dylan
02 Michael Jackson
01 The Beatles

Um...what the fuck is this?

How is Michael Jackson not Number #1?  Little kids are practically born knowing Michael Jackson's music.  Why is Justin Timberlake even on this list?  How hell did Beyonce beat out motherfuckin' Aretha?  Mary J. Blige?  What are Outkast and Mariah doing in the 90s?  What's ABBA doing in the 80s?  Why is Alicia Keyes on this list?  Why is Duran Duran not on this list?  How the hell did the likes of U2, Prince, Madonna, and the Beach Boys beat out friggin' Marvin Gaye?  Why isn't Phil friggin' Collins on this list?

Oh...so, so, so many questions.

RnB Music Blog wants to know why not a single Latin artist made the cut.  Damn good question.  You best believe I co-sign.  Remember "La Bamba", kids?  Ritchie my-main-man Valens?  Santana?  Selena?  Iglesias, Sr.?  Seriously, children?  RnB Music Blog also wants to know why Janet Jackson, Frank Sinatra, and the Supremes aren't on the list, along with "Rick James, Etta James, Celine Dion, Patti Labelle, Gladys Knight, The Temptations and Nat King Cole".  Uh...explanation please?  'Cause I want to know that too.

Meanwhile, the lil sis and I are wondering why the hell Lena Horne and Billie Holiday aren't on this list.  Bessie Smith ain't on this list?  People are reading this shit and their biggest criticism is why Nirvana's on list and why they're up so high?  Here's a hint: everyone knows Nirvana.  "Go into the deepest parts of the hood, play 'Smells Like Teen Spirit', and everyone will know it and love it'", says the lil sis.  "You know you're good when rappers love you, but are too afraid to sample you."  Damn straight.  Rappers know that if they touch Nirvana, they will be blasted back to the Stone Age.

"Apparently the names of the artists were chosen by a panel of music experts and musicians including; Alicia Keys, Ozzy Osbourne, Sean “Diddy” Combs, Iggy Pop, Nas, Rob Halford (Judas Priest), Michael Diamond (Beastie Boys), Daryl Hall, John Oates, Gene Simmons (KISS), Adam Levine (Maroon Five), 50 Cent, Nelly Furtado, Mandy Moore, Carrie Underwood, and Adam Clayton (U2) which explain why the compilation was so poorly done," RnB Music reports. In addition to these folks, 200 people reportedly cast their vote.

Yeah...200 clueless people.

Tack on the fact that Marshall University got their asses whooped by WVU last night within 3 minutes plus some overtime, and my head-splitting migraine is complete.

Comments

  1. lol this list is such is crock
    Not only did his career span a much longer time, look at the international reaction to MJ's death

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  2. That's all I'm saying!!

    The Beatles' members have been randomly dying off over the past few decades and when they do, Beatles' fans cry. When MJ, he crashed the internet, killed every artist on Bilboard, forced companies to starting producing CDs again, and plunged our whole planet into mourning.

    Who else can make the same claim?

    Kid Fury knows what's up.

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  3. How the hell did Cheap Trick get on this list?

    And David Bowie would wonder why the fuck Little Richie is some 15 slots below him.

    Clearly the people compiling the list don't know the rule about naming your sources.

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  4. VH1 needs help in general- but I agree. You'd think an artist who had the media mourning his death for a good year would be #1. And Aretha- definitely. Why isn't she on the list?

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  5. my friend and I have been watching this show and complaining all week.

    WTF is Justin Timberlake doing on that list? What has he done that is so original creative or different to put him above so many people? He shouldn't be on the damn list then to make it worse Usher isn't there but Justin is?

    Mariah has the most #1s of any artist yet she is at the back of the list. JT is more important than the Bee Gees and Earth Wind and Fire?

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  6. And Bob Marley should be higher up too. Man's been dead for a couple decades but everyone knows him and his music.

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  7. They asked a bunch of no-nothing teens and 20-somethings. That's who VH1 caters to now, the MTV kids who still want to see music videos (now that MTV is all shows and hardly any videos). It USED to be that MTV was for the kids and VH1 for their older sibs. Not anymore.

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  8. *blinks 10 times*

    and then people look at me crazy when i explain why i don't listen to the radio (and only pandora) and don't watch tv outside of selected shows from the internet and netflix.

    this nonsense right here.

    oh and a little reminder: michael jackson OWNED the beatles. LITERALLY.

    as in he owned their catalogs.

    the moonwalker: you can't fuck with him.

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  9. oh and a little reminder: michael jackson OWNED the beatles. LITERALLY.

    as in he owned their catalogs.


    Bwahahahahahahahah!!!!

    Hey...shouldn't The Roots be on this list?

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  10. "Hey...shouldn't The Roots be on this list?"

    Yes. A million times yes. This list is bollocks. I can't even believe a lot of these people are on here... nevermind. Yes I can.

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  11. It's a pathetic list, but then again, it's expected. This is the same network that gave the world shows like "Flavor of Love".

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  12. I've long ago stopped putting any stock in any of these lists.

    The problem is: how can we really compare artists from different genres of music? How does one compare, say, the Beatles to Stevie Wonder and say which one is better? (I say Stevie, personally.)

    It also shows the surreal reverence that white people have for Bob Dylan. Man, ever try to listen to that guy's music?

    Beyonce didn't beat Aretha, btw. But Aretha at a lowly #27 is the biggest crime on this list. And while I love me some Prince, him beating Stevie AND the Godfather is pretty crazy too.

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  13. that is seriously fucked up....i grew up in PoC majority countries and hadn't heard any of the beatles' music (or, admittedly, even of the beatles) until I was into my teens...and even then, they didn't really make that great of an impression on me....but MJ?....his songs were(and still are) played on street corners.

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  14. I think it's disgusting that they ranked Eminem over N.W.A, LL Cool J, and the Beastie Boys. Also, it's sickening that they ranked Hall and Oates over Alicia Keys. Honestly, music television sucks and has sucked for years so I'm not surprised that the list sucks too.

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  15. Led Zeppelin, The Rolling Stones, and *gag* Bob Dylan before the man who schooled them all and who Led Zeppelin constantly jacked? *eyeroll* I'm just surprised that they didn't sneak Eric Clapton in there ahead of him too. Bob Marley and Marvin bloody Gaye outside the top ten? But I guess we should be 'grateful' that Stevie scraped in at number 10.

    Madonna - an exploitative poseur who plain CANNOT sing, being on this list at all is a disgrace (but Grace Jones who not only paved the way for fashion art, gender bending and racial commentary pop but who could sing her ass off somehow isn't there.) And on top of that Madonna is ahead of Marvin Gaye? In what universe?

    Ray Charles almost halfway down the freaking list? The Cure's at number 74, and apparently aren't as good as Madonna either! *lmao*

    And do my eyes deceive, but where the fuck are THE SUPREMES?

    As for the MJ - they can keep trotting out the Beach Boys, Elvis, Dylan or the Beatles as much as they want. He is not second to ANY of their precious white artists. The problem that white rockists never get is that too much of their music is elitist, looks down on other musical forms (while stealing from them wholesale), is aggressively antagonistic towards other genres and doesn't culturally "cross-over" or inspire interest nearly as well as they 'think' it does.

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  16. Notice there are no women in the top 15 and only two in the top 30? And one of them is Madonna! I guest a girl has to sell a lot of soul to make an impression on this kind of chart. In their own very different ways both Madonna and Aretha have done just that.

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  17. thank you for writing this!!! vh1 was full of shit for making this list. i mean alicia keys was number 100 while justin and beyonce was higher than her. please. i like them and all,well more of beyonce but justin's ass did not deserve to be on that countdown. and how come other legends like luther, jackson 5, temptations, diana ross, janet and others didn't make it. madonna can't sing for shit yet she beats whitney and aretha who actually can sing? and for michael, the fact he had people talking about him, mourning him over his death all year long yet he's number 2?? nothing against the beatles but who really thinks of them any more? michael worked his ass off and beat more records and his music still last more than beatles and elvis put together. goes to show white people can't give a black person credit. i'm done watching their lists after that because they gave rock artists i barely know more recognition than the people who deserve it. the only time vh1 gave michael the number 1 spot was when he died because it was such a shock. yes it was but damn give the man some credit. they knew he was number 1 and belonged there. what generation of today know who the beatles are? i'm definitely listening to you more.

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  18. This list is a sad reflection of the times we live in. For all the anarchy of the internet, thank god for it! Without it, I'd think I was stuck in the past where the only music to be found stays vaulted in a pre-millenium time bank.

    The radio does not reflect the best of modern music and VH1 sure as hell doesn't either.

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