How FlashForward Went and Fucked Itself, Epilogue

How FlashForward Went and Fucked Itself I
How FlashForward Went and Fucked Itself II

Watched the finale on Hulu this afternoon.  There's not enough *retch* in the world.  Let's take a look at its main flaws one by one, shall we?

Zoey Was Absent

'Nough said.

Demetri Was All Over Janis Who, Naturally, Still Doesn't Want Him

Again...'nough said.

Mark Benford Lived

*twitch*

Meanwhile, the dialogue deteriorated to a new level of "atrocious", so much I actually flinched when I found myself getting annoyed with Jack Davenport, of all people.  There's supposed to be a film or mini-series or some other bullshit to "tie up loose ends" but at this point, I gotta ask the $64,000 question:

Who cares?

Seriously...it's the final episode and motherfuckin' John Cho got put on scenery duty.  Gabrielle Union was neither present or nor mentioned.  Christine Woods (Janis) had a kind of mushy moment with Cho, even though she's supposed to be playing a lesbian.  Not once does Cho's character mourn being dumped by his woman.  He doesn't even say her name or drop everything to go find her which, last I checked, people in love are supposed to do.

Twenty bucks says Cho had a migraine when he read the script.  All his luster was gone; all that passion and humor and charisma was just gone.  He had the look of a man so beyond annoyed with his role it broke my heart.

But anyways...Cho has recently finished playing "Kama" in his upcoming demented film Caller ID, has started work on his next Harold & Kumar film, and as we all know, has already signed on for two more Trek sequels, whose paychecks will no doubt vastly dwarf anything he earned from FlashForward.  Gabrielle Union is rumored to be in pre-production for her film The Van Zandt Shakedown - and if it goes down as planned, she'll have top billing, y'all...just as the gods intended.

In the meantime, Michael Ealy is part of the hot, young, mostly colorful cast of Takers (in theaters this August).  And Christine Woods has just finished starring in Sveener and the Shmiel (again, top billing), while Courtney B. Vance is currently filming The Divide with an all-star ensemble.  So FlashForward, thank you very much for paying the rent while these fine folks got where they actually needed to go.

Fuck your writers very much, and have a nice day.

Comments

  1. If I hadn't watched every episode this season, I would never guess Janis was a lesbian or that Demetri had a fiancee--I was reading the Gay/Bi/Straight thread of TWoP, just out of curiosity, to see if anyone mentioned the absurdity Demetri/Janis/Zoey thing there, and I was happy to see that at least one person noted that even under the whole Somalia conditions, sleeping with a man is not the last resort for a lesbian wanting to get pregnant. Plus I'm scratching my head on how Demetri and Janis were so sure she'd get pregnant after sex just one time--what if they'd slept together and she hadn't? Seems like finding a way to collect and insert the sperm would make way more sense, because then she could try multiple times. But why am I even trying to make sense of this at this point?

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  2. Seems like finding a way to collect and insert the sperm would make way more sense, because then she could try multiple times.

    Exactly. He would most likely jerk off and hand over the sperm - most heteros don't realize that that's how it works in the real world.

    But non-minority folk watching this don't care about that. They want to see the black women left behind by any means necessary, and ignore the reality of homosexuality altogether.

    And by the way...who the hell has consensual sex while being held hostage in a shack in Somalia? Demetri shouldn't have even been able to get it up with all those guns pointed at his head and Vogel constantly talking smack about Zoey marrying another man.

    Which is another thing...how can Demetri, in one scene, get annoyed hearing about Zoey marrying someone else, but then turn around and offer to sleep with Janis?

    Confused writing much?

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  3. Moi,

    Yes! Without being crude, I don't even know how he could get it up for Janis. The idea of sleeping with my closest male friend kind of grosses me out, and I'm straight--how could Janis feel about having to be penetrated (in one episode I think she said the last time she was with a guy was high school, and she didn't make it clear whether she'd ever actually had sex with one or not) by a male, her engaged friend no less.

    Do you think that if Zoey were White people would feel offended and affronted on her behalf (and on the behalf of lesbians)? I know that television requires suspension of disbelief, and we often root for characters to do things we would never do, but really now?

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  4. Do you think that if Zoey were White people would feel offended and affronted on her behalf (and on the behalf of lesbians)?

    Yes. I believe it whole-heartedly. If Zoey had been white, the outcry from white audiences would've been deafening.

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  5. I call BS on FF! How could Zoey not be in the series finale? I'm glad I didn't waste my time.

    I'm so effing sick of black woment being treated like red-headed stepchildren I could spit! Sorry, I'm a little pissed off. I just read a Uhura/Spock fic that made Uhura "partially African" and I'm still spitting mad. And the bullshit explanation by the author for why they did it pisses me off even more. (Moi, I would love, love, love it if you'd write a post on that particular phenomenom if you haven't already because its a real pet peeve of mine).

    As a black woman, I'm tired of being marginalized, less than, not good enough. Either we're angry, fat, and happily single *or* we have to be mixed with something else to be acceptable. I'm still hoping against hope that having Michelle Obama and those two beautiful girls in the WH will make a difference of how black women are viewed by the society at large, but I'm certainly not going to hold my breath.

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  6. I just read a Uhura/Spock fic that made Uhura "partially African" and I'm still spitting mad. And the bullshit explanation by the author for why they did it pisses me off even more. (Moi, I would love, love, love it if you'd write a post on that particular phenomenom if you haven't already because its a real pet peeve of mine).

    Oh, yes...I did that.

    I linked it here.

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  7. Moi, if you're not careful, I'll take up residence in all of your journals.

    I found the "partially African" Uhura thread yesterday. Thankfully, our mod in all of "her" infinite wisdom set that skank straight. I wanted to ask exactly how that skank explained black Vulcans. Were they partially African, too? This pissed me royally because Zoe Saldana goes through great lengths to openly promote her BLACKNESS despite the fact that much of the hispanic media tries to get her admit that she's a "dark-skinned Latina." Obviously, those guys are from Miami.

    As for Zoey and Dem... major fuck up. Perhaps if the writers had done right by this couple, they would have had the viewship to keep the show afloat. I hope await the day that the God of Time permits me to take up fan fiction again.

    @Jasmin
    Plus I'm scratching my head on how Demetri and Janis were so sure she'd get pregnant after sex just one time--what if they'd slept together and she hadn't?

    There's too much logic and common sense within your question. I can't imagine what was going on in in the heads of the writers when they wrote that crap.

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  8. Moi, if you're not careful, I'll take up residence in all of your journals.

    Be my guest. In the Land of Moi, there's no shortage of room at the bar.

    Plus I'm scratching my head on how Demetri and Janis were so sure she'd get pregnant after sex just one time--what if they'd slept together and she hadn't?

    Yeah...and wasn't all her shit fucked up? Wasn't conception supposed to be extra difficult for her? Did the writers forget that, along with her homosexuality?

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  9. Since there was a crucial addendum to the Uhura is not a mixed girl either, I wonder if the mod couldn't tweak the dates so that it appears on the front page for a few days.

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  10. Hateya,

    *shakes head* Don't hold thy breath.

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  11. @hateya

    This particular story is also on ff.net. If you get a chance, check out the author's notes at the end of chapter 3. The authors went out of their way to explain that Uhura is not better because of the mixed heritage that they bestowed upon her (because you know, because of Uhura's complexion [by way of Zoe Saldana], Uhura must have an French or Irish great-grandparent somewhere), and that it doesn't really matter to them anyway.

    That makes me ask the next logical question...if it doesn't really matter, why make her anything other than what Gene Roddenberry envisioned her to be in the first place? (BTW, there's a fucked-up explanation for that too). Read at your own risk because you will be ticked off by the time you're done.

    @ Moi

    Thanks for the links. That's exactly what I was looking for. It's like some of these people (fanfic writers, Hollywood writers and the like) don't get that the demographics of the country are quickly changing and people are more than ready for both the print media and TV and film to reflect that. They're determined to hold onto their preconceived notions about race.

    The bad thing is, they also think people share their preconceived notions. Some do, but I truly believe that most don't or at least are open-minded enough to try something different. Unfortunately, the ones holding all the cards are the same ones that aren't willing to let go of the status quo.

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  12. I'm disappointed to read Zoey didn't end up shooting Dem because I was really hoping for it after the Somali ep which is when I quit watching.

    It's great to see all the minorities have jobs lined up. I'm betting whatever they are talking about to tie up the loose ends will never see the light of day. They are just talking to save some face.

    I'm a little mad at y'all for making me go find that "partially African" Uhura thread e_O

    @Hateya You can't reorder posts in LJ comms only in journals. You could rec Nyota ain't mixed in the Weekly Rec post though, lol.

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  13. That makes me ask the next logical question...if it doesn't really matter, why make her anything other than what Gene Roddenberry envisioned her to be in the first place?

    My recommendation is to always go ahead and ask the author this via review. Give them a scathing review along with that question.

    I'm getting annoyed with WP talking out both side of their mouths about. If making Uhura mixed with white doesn't make her better or really matter, then the author shouldn't go out of her way to whiten her - it's racist, pure and simple, and readers need to let authors know right away and without sugarcoating.

    And make sure to follow-up with a "being emo buys you nothing" when they cry, "I'm offended, I'm not a racist, how dare you, you're the racist, blah blah blah...."

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  14. Btw, Cinnamon, what's the link to that story?

    I feel like making an example of someone today.

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  15. It's on Live Journal and FF.net. Make sure you read both (but read Live Journal first). You'll get doubly mad, but they're both worth a read.

    FF.net:
    http://www.fanfiction.net/s/6000142/1/A_Pragmatic_Theory_of_Truth

    Live Journal:
    http://community.livejournal.com/spock_uhura/834597.html


    I think its important to note that the story was first posted on Live Journal where the "partially African" gaffe was pointed out and one of the authors immediately got her ass on her back. She got offended, got smart and was immediately smacked down in epic fashion by the mod. One of the author's seemed very open to listening to constructive cristism and why everyone was so offended by their characterization of Uhura. The other one never responded back after offering a half-hearted (and probably insincere) mea culpa for her initial ass on back response to the original criticism and the mod's subsequent smack down.

    So imagine my shock when I see the same story on FF.net and the long-winded expanation of their tinkering with Uhura's heritage (after someone questioned it in their review). That is what really set me off. I felt like they hadn't taken in anything that was very politely, yet firmly pointed out to them on Live Journal. Nothing. It went in one ear and out the other.

    It seems as if the only thing that they learned was to go the extra mile of trying to explain that they didn't care what Uhura is and that being mixed didn't make her better, yadda, yadda, yadda. Grrr... I'm getting worked up again. Woosah.

    Moi, I look forward to whatever smackdown you're about to lay on these two. I think I'm about to get a FF acct so that I can leave a "review."

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  16. @Cinnamon
    I read the author's notes you linked us to and I saw where they're trying to make *us* POCs out to be bullies while all they're trying to do is spread Gene Roddenberry's utopian vision of the future. Do they have any idea how stupid and pathetic they sound? Probably not.

    @Mojitochica

    Thank you for the info about LJ communities and backdating. I have made the recommendation per your excellent suggestion.

    I laughed when you mentioned Zoey shooting Dem because that thought my mind more than once. If I wasn't hearting John Cho so much, I would have been all over that bandwagon.

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  17. @Moi,

    I haven't even read this story because I always read the comments before I read fanfiction... for good reason, apparently.

    Here's the link you asked Cinnamon for. Due to the time difference, I thought I could get it to you before Cinnamon comes back online.

    http://www.fanfiction.net/s/6000142/1/A_Pragmatic_Theory_of_Truth

    I also rec'd your post in the weekly thread. Maybe I should do so next week, too.

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  18. I've gotten into a tussle with that author.

    Seriously...it's like talking to a wall.

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  19. Moi,

    Yes, Janis got shot in the stomach (or the uterus, I don't remember), so the doctor told her it'd be pretty much impossible for her to get pregnant, through insemination or otherwise. We know that continuity isn't a strength of this show (and "Screw Zoey!" is the unofficial mantra), so I'm really not surprised at how it played out.

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  20. I've gotten into a tussle with that author.

    Seriously...it's like talking to a wall.


    I've added my two cents after reading your back and forth (fangirl_utopia). Boy, she wasn't trying to hear you, was she? You did a great job though. Let's see if she reponds to your last comment. You made it absolutely plain, but the truth might hurt too much for her to respond.

    @Mojitochica

    I wasn't too far off that mark with the Demitri/Janis thing myself. I remember sitting there watching going, "I know he's not suggesting what I think he's suggesting!" and then "I know Janis is not actually thinking about accepting!" It was total and utter bullshit and from what I've read, critics also agree. I'm glad it got cancelled. Maybe it'll make TPTB realize that not everyone is enamored with the white characters that they're always so desperate to shove in our faces week after week. (Yeah, not holding my breath.)

    PS. Does anyone here watch Hawthorne or Eureka? Two of the few shows on TV with black female leads and both getting ready to start their new seasons. Yay!

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  21. Hm, OpenID isn't working today...

    We're close to a bingo! "I dated an Asia chick" and "There are people of color in my family" were really close.

    It's really interesting (read: fucking bullshit) that acknowledging Uhura's African roots translates into mentioning Uhura's skin color rather doing some damn research on actually an African culture. SMDH.

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  22. Cinnamon,

    Thanks for posting there, and no, she's not trying to listen to anyone at all.

    Do you have any links for the critics who disagreed with the Dem/Janis coupling?

    And while I watched Hawthorne and wasn't diggin' it (I think the writers are white), I didn't realize there's a black female lead in Eureka. I never saw one the commercials but...aight...gonna check it out. Merci!

    Mojito,

    I forgot about the BINGO!!!! I take it she must not have read that shit!!!

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  23. Well, the general race bingo card isn't in the Racefail post, and you know that chick ain't going in search of anti-racist material.

    I almost feel like going mitochondrial Eve on her ass with her continual insistence that Spock reaction to Uhura is in anyway logical.

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  24. Notice that the Brit had to come in and clean up the American's mess - and managed to do so in a single comment.

    *shakes head*

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  25. I had to go back over there for thirds, fourths and fifths. Let's see if she responds.

    I saw the other author's remark and was very pleasantly surprised. I thought it was classy and well thought out. It gave me a modicum of hope that talking to people about this stuff actually does make a difference. But only if they're willing to listen.

    @Moi

    Eureka comes on Fridays @ 9 on SyFy (I hate that name). The female lead is Salli Richardson-Whitfield and this is the fourth season. It begins on July 9th.

    I watched season 1 of Hawthorne and will return for season 2. There's so damn little of us a leads on TV, I feel compelled to watch. If I see one more boring blond white woman lead, I'm going to scream. Every Fall we see the same formula--a boring blond white woman, a clean-cut young white man, a black man, an older white man and if the budget allows, a brunette white woman. If there's a black woman in the mix at all, she's way in the background and you'll only see her every fifth episode or so when they need someone sassy to provide some sassy comic relief. 'Cause you know...we're sassy!

    BTW, have you every considered having open threads where people could talk about whatever (within reason of course)? I feel like I hijacked this thread with my Uhura/Spock rantings and I certaintly didn't mean to do that.

    PS. I'm looking for those links for the Dem/Janis thing.

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  26. Every Fall we see the same formula--a boring blond white woman, a clean-cut young white man, a black man, an older white man and if the budget allows, a brunette white woman.

    Bwahahahahahahahah!

    By the way, don't worry about thread-jacking - this is all perfectly on topic: The violation of black female leads (and actors of color in general. Cho deserved waaaaaaay better than this).

    So by all means...continue.

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  27. I'm baaaccckkk. Okay, here's what I found. I don't know how to make my links all cute and small within a comment, so I'm just going to paste them as is. FYI...some are forums that I found interesting.

    http://popwatch.ew.com/2010/04/09/flashforward-recap-queen-sacrifice/

    http://nymag.com/daily/entertainment/2010/04/flashforward_recap_somalia.html

    http://www.televisionwithoutpity.com/show/flash_forward/better_angels_1.php?page=9

    http://www.facebook.com/topic.php?uid=147812530863&topic=17254

    http://forums.vwvortex.com/showthread.php?4548536-Flashforward-new-tv-show/page20

    http://www.fanpop.com/spots/flashforward/picks/show/418023/1x13-dimitri-janice

    And then there's this. Warning: This will piss you off. Someone's busted-ass idea of a recap (http://fandomania.com/tv-review-flashforward-114-better-angels/):

    That said, this mission to Somalia had me all over the place. In the column for proving that flash forwards do come true, we have Janis getting pregnant. At least, I am assuming that she and Demetri went ahead and did what desperate times call for. When Janis was lamenting about being un-pregnant, and Demetri said, “the weekend’s not over,” I about died. I think I fell out of my chair. This is perfect and awesome in so many ways. First of all, it’s ensuring that Janis does get pregnant, just like she saw herself in her vision. Also, Demetri is, in a way, acknowledging his impending doom. He even told Janis he’s not so worried about cheating on Zoey, and that having a little legacy of himself continue on (after his assumed death) would be nice. The whole conversation was tangibly awkward and awesome, and just well done. And I’d be lying if I didn’t say that a part of me was a teensy bit afraid that Janis was going to get pregnant in a not-so-amicable way. This whole setting in Somalia has been more violent than most of the show, so I don’t think I’m off base. I mean: hostage situation, angry gunmen, Somalia, war time, a character we know should be getting inseminated… let’s just say I was fretting a violent worst-case scenario, so I am delighted in Demetri’s offer for more than one reason.


    This thing is wrong on so many levels I don't even know where to begin. Who cares about Zoey the fiancee and her irrelevant feelings as long as Janis got her precious baby, right? And of course, the big, black, angry Africans were just dying to get their big, black, angry African hands on the poor white woman. I'm so sick of some white folks and their privilege, I don't know what to do with myself. This shit is getting old.

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  28. Wow...that recap made my corneas itch. Will check out the other links ASAP.

    Btw, the html code you're looking for is:

    add cute words here

    Voila.

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  29. http://www.televisionwithoutpity.com/show/flash_forward/better_angels_1.php?page=9

    Finally - a critic who felt Demetri needed to turn his attentions back to his own woman.

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  30. I think I may have finally gotten through to her. She responded to my review on ff.net, and we've been pm-ing each other on the subject. I was determined not to give up and I think I'm getting somewhere. I encouraged her and her co-author to continue to post their story...that to stop posting because of that discussion would be too easy and wouldn't be productive. I'm glad they listened.

    We're going to continue a dialogue with other, where I will continue to explain racial issues to her and allow her to ask me questions. She's a WIP, but the fact that she's willing to do it gives me hope. I hope I'm not being a Pollyanna, but I have to at least try.

    And--suprisingly--she may have stumbled into doing something for me. I too write Spock/Uhura fanfiction, but I'm too much of a chickenshit to post it. She wants to read it, so I'm going to lock my page and friend her so she can read it. That will be my first step to posting it publicly. I never would've thought that such a contentious discussion would have lead to these things, but isn't that usually how great discoveries are made?

    Thanks for getting involved in this. I'm actually growing a set of balls (figuratively speaking of course) and she's learning and learning to listen.

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  31. Moi,

    I really wonder what the actors would say about that plotline--could they buy it? And I'm still not (probably won't ever) get the argument that it makes sense that "best friends" Dem and Janis would make a baby together. Even if he was unattached, it seems like having a baby by someone you know could create all kinds of possessiveness/parental issues--given the circumstances, it would have made much more sense to have sex with (fine-ass) Michael Ealy--Janis had some kind of relationship with him (since he recruited her to be a double agent), and he's nowhere near ugly (don't know if Janis would care about male attractiveness though). I was counting on him being the dad, though I guess that opens up another can of worms concerning Mike Ealy being shafted in the romance department, though he was obviously the finest guy on the show (possibly tied with Lee Thompson Young)--how can Lloyd get some while he doesn't?!?

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  32. @ cinnamon,

    You're welcome. You truly are a good soul. Moi...*shakes head* not so much.

    @ Jasmin,

    I really wonder what the actors would say about that plotline--could they buy it?

    No. Absolutely not. Halfway through the second half of the season, they stopped "acting". They basically showed up to work, recited their lines, went home, cashed their checks, and started job-hunting.

    No wonder so many of them have either already completed or are currently in the middle of new projects.

    Janis is gay - period. The writers should've explored her relationships with women further, not found the flimsiest excuse possible to put her in bed with a man. She shouldn't have been sleeping with any men whatsoever. Heteros may not "get this", but homosexuals definitely do...lesbians in particular. How often do they have to "remind" men they actually, honestly, truthfully, really just don't want them, aren't attracted to them, and genuinely are gay? Putting Janis in bed with a man basically spits in the face of the lesbian community.

    And by the way, I tend to think that had Janis been an actress of color, this plotline would've never come about. A lesbian of color would've probably and conveniently vanished after the fourth episode, and that's pushing it by three.

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  33. No. Absolutely not. Halfway through the second half of the season, they stopped "acting". They basically showed up to work, recited their lines, went home, cashed their checks, and started job-hunting.

    The sad thing is, based on what Gabrielle Union said, they purposely put Dem and Zoey together because you never see that pairing on TV, and then they go and take the relationship in that ridiculous direction?

    I swear, it seems as if the new showrunners were doing everything in their power to destroy that show. Well, they got their wish.

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  34. Moi,

    What you just wrote was what made me so disappointed in some tv discussion communities--any other time a lesbian being put with a man would be a big no-no, but when a Black woman stands to lose, some are all for it. I've never heard it argued in other situations that it was acceptable that a lesbian slept with a man on a tv show because they are "such good friends"--isn't that just another lame tv trope done to titillate in time for sweeps?

    Cinnamon, I wouldn't be surprised if the writers patted themselves on the back for "being progressive" and left it at that--some people play with ethnicities like Cabbage Patch Kids, never stopping to consider the humanity behind us. Is it any wonder that this usually ends in massive fail?

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  35. OK so Demetri knows a flashforward is about to happen. Yet he doesn't call the love of his life to make sure she is safe? Mark is the king of the assholes but he calls his wife to make sure she and their child is safe even though he knows she is with another man.

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